Song Title "Mary Says"

How long has it been since I held you near?
How long will it be till I have you right here?
You say that it hurts I can't disagree
But how can I hold on to someone who's leaving me?
And mary says she's gonna be OK
She tells me things are getting busier these days
(She tells me things will be much easier someday)
And mary says she's gonna be alright
You know how much I miss her in my life
(You know how much I'm missing her deep inside)
Goodbye yesterday, I see my dreams walking away
And mary looks just like she did before
Except she don't love me, she don't love me anymore
I could shake your hand or I could kiss you goodbye
But I just might break down looking in your brown eyes
So what happens next do I listen to my mind or heart?
I don't know where to start feeling alright again…….


Some sort related to my feelings right now.... oh ya btw this is the song that u r hearing in my blog..

Left 3 more weeks..

It has been a long long time since i last update my blog.. this has been a pretty tired week, although my life only revovles around my hse and wrkplace, i am still beri tired!! i dunnoe y.. has been trying to catch up with alot of sleep. but the strange thing is tat no matter hw much sleep i try to catch up with i still feel like sleeping more, especially in the day time.

this whole week is a pretty boring affair.. been thinking of taking scuba course but no one to accompany me, so decided to drop the idea for the time being.. i hope to go scuba wif the special someone of my life... hai.. anyway, the scuba is a real cheap deal $200 for the whole course, i was really really tempted by it but shit, no ppl either got the time or spare cash to join me!! WTF!! gng alone is so boring.. hai, nvm save up the money to buy on something else then.

this is such a boring week!! it's so boring that i have nothing interesting to put it in here!! i think i have to spice up my life a little next week.. didn't know my life was so monotonous until i try to write this.. BORING!!!!!

aiya almost forgot to link back to the topic of this entry.. i have confirm and paid for my air tix, i'm flying off and leaving everything here again on the 13th Feb.. well not actually is 13th feb, it 14th feb early early early morning at 0005 hrs. i'm gonna miss a lot of things again.. neber like to leave so many things ard.. really will miss it alot.. not looking forward to the date.. :(

Night out with a pretty ger..

wah lau i just lost a 600 words blog entry due to this toopid internet connectivity which gets cut off when i click publish post!! AARRRGGGGHHHHH!!! now have to retype liao.. can't remember what i have put in just now.. *sigh* life is jz so unfair.. rethink n retype again lor, wat to do??

i thought i would gonna have a very boring n lonely nite at home on a fridayz nite.. thought of catching a movie, but doesn't seem to be able to find anyone who is free and have not the show i want to watch.. i noe but i should have watch new shows instead of shows that's weeks old but can't help it rite?? if i dun watch it i wun be able to watch it anymore in the theatre.. oso can't blame me previously was too busy wif wrk life so haven't got any chance to watch it when it was still "new".. i really thought i was gonna stay at hm to rot the whole day, till this angel appear after reading my previous blog entry..

but the only catch is that i have to go into JB to find her.. well she was equally bored too.. hehe.. so each of us jz need an activity partner tat's all.. in the beginning i wasn't really fantastic over gng into JB, as there was a 1000 reasons of not doing so (there's really a thousand reason of not doing so..), but after 1/2 hr of persuasion (obviously i try to persuade to cme SG), i finally gave in, since JB isn't really that far away frm my hse either.. and of coz it has been sometime since we last met each other.. as what she has counted a total of 7 yrs!! that's amazing rite?? after 7 yrs n we r still in contact with each other.. i guess that what technology suspose to do? shrink the world n bring each other closer.. we have been frds for like 10++ yrs, thinking of it now really makes me feel old.. hmm.. although a decade has past this ger has not change at all, maybe jz a little bit more talkative and definitely prettier.. n she is one hell of a playful ger, very naughty indeed..

nw for my adventurous trip there.. neber ever thought of i will watch movie in malaysia b4, but isn't a bad experience afterall.. the seats were very cushy n comfortable, the sound system were fantastic too.. n watching original cantonese show without dubbing over effect were infact better.. i thought i gonna have difficulty understand cantonese but it wasn't that bad too, well the only bad thing is that they don't have english subtitle!! well my chinese wasn't really fantastic.. anyway 1 thing for sure is that i have enjoyed the movie alot.. maybe it's bcoz its Stephen Chow movie, his movie can never fail to make ppl laugh.. opps i think i 4got to mention i was watching Kung Fu Hustle!! it's a great show do watch it.. oh jz b4 i forgot i wanna complain abt this toopid tall guy head infront of me.. his head is so big and he is sitting at such a high angle, kaoz for a moment i tot i was watching a cheap pirated VCD!!

anywayz the fun begins after movie.. with a pretty ger n handsome guy (that's me!!) and with a beautiful cresent moon jz above our head, we must obviously head for someplace romantic n nice right? Danga Bay is where we head for.. that place was really nice, beautiful sidewalk by the beach, cooling breeze brushing against ur face, cosy dim beautiful lights that lit the endless sidewalk, ands cafe all over the place.. have i mention there was soothing music throughout the place?? man.. this is definitely one place u couples out there should go!! u ppl dun need to admire me jz yet, coz she got a bf liao.. she said her bf size is alot bigger than me, so dun wanna play play huh.. hehe.. (dunnoe will i get chop for saying this anot?)

this wat Danga Bay is all about, looking up in the sky is the beautiful crescent moon..

take a look at the vessel, with the extremely calm waters and reflection of the lights from the vessel, it's somewhere u jz wanna be.. i think it's quite an ideal environment for the cheapskate version of titanic.. "Jack, I'm flying....."



yup that's the pretty ger i was toking about, have i mention that she was a doctor?? nice place to be rite??



i think this doctor gonna kill me for putting this picture up.. hei doctor i think one day someone may cme n look up this blog u might bcom a celebrity dr.. dun need to thank me.. hehe.. anyway i think this was a well taken pic, dun u agree?? anyway pretty ger any angle take oso will pretty one rite?? hehe.. oh ya i think i have to bear a little responsibility for the lost of ur autopass card.. she was jz generous enuff to leave it for the next person to use it, see pretty ger wif a BIG heart.. hehe.. really sorrie about the card, really feel guilty n bad abt it.. sorrie.... i will make up in other ways ok?? sorrie.............

Boring Life..

Oh man.. ever since i started working on this night shift thing, i can few my life is getting more boring by the seconds.. yes your eye is not playing trick on you, i said it's getting more boring by the SECONDS!! that's hw bad it is!! when everyone starting the day i m ending my, and the super turned off part is when everyone ending their day i m starting my day!! lucky tonite is the last of my nite shift for THIS week.. this is really sucky lor, wanna catch a movie oso not able to do it.. i want to watch Kung Fu Hustle, Meet The Fockers, Ocean Twelve, wat else?? anyone wanna watch wif me anot??

you know wrking all these nite shift reminds me of the time when i was doing my national service.. it really feel as if i m doing my guard duty!! but the only diff is there's no one here for me to "screw"!! and worst thing is that i was the one kena "screwed"!! really dun understand y ppl can call in the middle of night, dun they need to sleep? dun they have a tiny little bit of feeling that they are really disturbing someone?? it's not as if it will be the end of the world when u can't connect to the internet! hmm... cme back to think of it, the ppl trying to connect are mostly guys! r they trying to connect to the internet so urgently jz bcoz they wanna surf porn?? i receive a call that day, and it was soooooo super gross!! the caller was doing all those heaving panting and breathing while talking to me!! For goodness sake, does troubleshooting his computer really turn him on so much?? strange ppl indeed..

oh ya.. thanx victor for ur comments.. and congrats u r the 1st one to drop the comments in!! abt the gathering will definitely organise one hor.. dun worry i promise i will meet up b4 i fly back.. although a bit shortage of time liao but i will still squeeze out some..

Happening Week

Hmm.. so sianz.. night shift is so boring!! now happingly slouching in this big big armchair, with my leg up on the table and keyboard on my lap.. i wonder wat if my boss were to walk in right now??

anywayz, nothing much to do now.. so decided to update a little bit on my blog.. Saturday, went to O bar, and the toopid chris make me drink so much till i started puking all over the place.. well not really all over the place, jz at the lamppost or tree.. can't remember!! i guess i should have puke into his shirt, he was practically luffing his head off in his brain or was he literally luffing!! ARRGGHHH!! too drunk to remember and not significant enough for me to remember.. but he wasn't that fantastic either, after drinking so much from the games that he constantly lost to me, he was toking lots n lots of crap!! super lots of crap.. and u noe wat, those craps doesn't make a lot of sense to me.. well maybe i wasn't that sober in putting those craps into deep thoughts.. but since when craps need to put into deep thoughts?? oh man.. i wonder WTF am i writting now.. making no sense at all!! think the alcohol effect is still in me??

*sigh* i can't account for the number of times i have puke during this short vacation back in singapore. perhaps i have not been drinking for quite sometime therefore alcohol retention is very poor or maybe something is bothering me and drinking is one way to drown it?? i have to admit in the beginning i was really drowning my sorrows (not talking about this occasion).. i will seek every chance to drink till almost drop dead and dozing off immediately when my head hits my pillow. well in fact i will fall asleep practically my head "hits" anything.. but think i need to cut down a little bit.. too taxing on body.. hmm.. i wonder if i were to go on this way, will i bcom an alcoholic?? think i really need to put some serious thinking into this..

oh no!! the "Zzz Monster" is getting into me.. suddenly can feel my brain slowing down.. think getting retarded very very soon...

anyway today(monday) had a great time meet up with almost all my army mates.. so much things to talk.. i think if not for tml a wrking and i have to come to this miserable place, think we can talk for the whole nite.. really there was so much to talk about.. so much things to catch up with one another.

Thoughts of the Day:
You know sometimes i really wonder if she do miss me anot?? i really do not understand hw can a person change so much during such a short time?? the oni ans i can think of is there must be something dramatic that happen, if not it is not possible for someone to evovle into someone that is so extreme.. i really do not understand!! Life is so complex.. y can't it so simple?? wat u see is wat u get? I once told her, Life is already that complex, shouldn't we simplify things instead of causing things more complicated??

This entry is delicated to the victims of the Tsunami

A minute of silence for the victims of the Tsunami.

Somethings just aren't the same when you are alone..

Might not be a good start afterall..

Yoz.. thanks for ur concern for my sickness.. <-- bernard. ;) I am feeling so much better, after the dreadful night on Tue..

Gee.. didn't noe it was friday liao.. time really really flies when u are busy.. hmm.. i would said this week quite happening, 1st my colleague E is sick then have to reschedule all my shift, which is making me "lifeless".. What life can i expect when i have to start work at 2pm and end at 11pm rite?? then who knows colleague still hasn't recovered yet!! 1 week MC liao still sick, think he must be feeling pretty bad, jz heard that he has extended his MC again...... and as predicted i have to work on Sat.. *sigh* never have been so accurate in predicting things, maybe i should buy some lottery, who knows i might struck a few millions.. and i can ask said F**k off to everyone liao.. HAHHAHAHAHA..

ok.. back to the harsh reality.. :( yesterday was a pretty rough day, got pretty piss off by colleague G.. KNN i really really hate backstabber and "po toh kia".. well, i've make a small mistake and he just need to tell the whole world the story!! then in the end, i kena ticked off.. Why is it in this world there are so much hypocrites?? "smiling" when in front of u and "stabbing" u when u turn ur back against them.. I really wonder do these types of ppl have any frds?? my deepest condolence to their frds.. hmm.. maybe hypocrites hang out together?? so that they can enjoy the fun of "stabbing" each other..

u know there is sometimes in life when u really miss someone terribly?? *sigh* today is the day.. suddenly waking up n missing her so much.. lots of things flashes my mind recently, i really do not know whether i should keep a promise for someone who doesn't keep it..

Thoughts of the Day:
To computer idiots out there, if u don't know how to use a computer, go learn it urself, don't go and trouble ppl in the suppoet centre!!

Cough Cough..

Arrggghhh.. sick liao!! last nite took my temp.. 38C!! but surprisingly today still can come to work alive.. last night i tot i was going to die in my work place.. FYI, i am using my voice to earn money, then the calls that came in last nite was so much.. somemore i kept coughing throughout the whole conversation, of coz the end user do not noe, dun wanna get complain for coughing!! by the time my shift ended i can feel my voice is cracking, feel as if there is a toad in the throat.. *labbit*

why izzit these few daes keep on raining.. rain always remind me of her.. so sad leh.. feel as if got something not completed yet.. doesn't like that feeling..

anywayz, this morning came to work and found out my supp is on MC.. cool man.. the world belongs to me today!! (as if i care if she is around anot..) think there is a lot of virus spreading around the office, everyone is falling sick.. hmm.. if i were to take MC tml, i think a lot of ppl is gonna curse me.. i've got a feeling i will be called back to work for the weekend, but nvm, more work means more money!! best thing is i think i can get OT pay for the weekends.. anywayz since i'm just getting pay for writting blog and surfing net, well jz have to give up a little bit of life tats all..

ppl out there, leave some comments around ley.. for ppl who has no idea oh hw to do it, here's the procedure..
Step1 - Click on the word Comments.
Step2 - Click on Post Comments.
Step3 - Type in your comments. (please don't add crap inside.. thx..)
Step4 - Hit save and you are done.*
*note: It might take a while for the comments to appear. Can't blame me, i have no controls over it.. ;P

Don't feel right today..

hmm.. this morning seems like waking up from the wrong side of the bed.. but not possible since i can only wake up from one side of bed, as the other side is the wall.. got a sick sick feeling hanging on to me since yesterday.. Arrggghhh.. last week was migraine this week this again?? feel like going for a brain transplant, so that can put my brain into a much better body.. hahaha....

today really woke up from the wrong side, woke up late and tots of her seems to linger in my brain the moment i woke.. doesn't feel good.. WHY?!? Aiyo 3rd day of 2005 got hiccups liao.. but nvm things will be better..

Anyway i was really very "pei fu" with myself, for the whole of the weekend stay at home.. feels like b'coming a hermit liao.. actually was thinking of volunteering with the Red Cross, but KNN email them dunnoe how to reply one leh.. but might as well lah, whole of weekend raining so also a tiny little bit lazy of moving.. (think have to add "stop procastinating" into my new yr resolution AGAIN..)

hmm.. still no program after work, so bored.. feel like catching a movie, so long never watch movie liao.. i wonder who will be free on monday night?? perhaps i should give them a msg after my lunch.. to be continue............

Happy New Year!!

Happy New Year to all!!
WOAH!! 2005 finally arrived.. i have waited this year think since 2004 came.. hei i m 100% serious!! not even a bit exaggerating lor.. well since this is my so call 1st official blog entry, i think i will do abit intro 1st.

well.. let's tok abt this blog 1st.. created this blog on my Bday.. as mentioned, this blog will be delicated to her.. as she is the one who make it possible lor, after she left i was basically left with too much time on my hand, then somemore can't even tok to her.. so might as well create a blog, put in my feelings and hopefully she will see this blog one day.. ppl out there, if u noe who i m toking about please let her noe that such a site exists.. at least i can increase the percentage of her seeing all these rite?? THANKS HUR!!

today is the 1st day of 2005~~ really excited abt this year lor.. coz lz year basically my life was in a mess.. the number of extras and weekend duty that i done is uncountable, the things that happen in my life jz isn't gng as expected.. everytime i hope for this to happen, then the opposite will actually happen.. wat is worst is the fact that i lost her.. when she tell me, i was really really devasated, so much so that i think i let myself fall into depression.. but thankfully, i manage to realise things were gng a little too far off track. wat worse was that all these things happen while i was in australia.. i really feel so helpless n hopeless.. and till now i still feel so helpless..

i tot i can win her back when i cme back to singapore but the more i try, the further she go.. hai.. feel so toopid.. yes i noe, u guy has advice me not to be toopid lor.. but u noe sometimes ppl jz need to find the ans by themselves b4 they can see the whole pic.. there was so many occasion that i walked aimlessly to nowhere and it always jz ended up to somewhere near her.. it really feel so terrible at that time.. ok ppl.. u can scold me nw.. i really feel so toopid now.. but i can tell i have not regret wat i have done.. :) hmm... i wonder if this blog can add emoticons anot?? u shall find out in my nz blog entry..

oh ya b4 i forgot i wanna apologise to her for all the inconvinence caused by my foolish behave.. the paragraph below is for her..

[[dun be angry anymore lah hor.. i was really really blinded by emotions that i couldn't control.. really please forgive the mistakes that i have done, there is no one in this world that is perfect.. it oni takes hw long for one to realise the mistakes.. there was a proverb or something like tat, tat said "To Err is Human, To Forgive is Saint" correct me if i am wrong..

err.. if u ever were to feel guilty abt wat u done, pls dun.. coz frm the day that i have make my decision to be wif u, i have oreadi forgiven ur mistakes.. if ever u need energy, strength and support for some very difficult decision and period, and no one else u can turn to, feel free to come n look for me.. i definitely will be there.. u will always be welcome.. there r lots of things that i still wanna tell u and give u, but i neber really have a chance to do so.. i really hope that we can still be friends.. hope that u will ring me up one day..]]

hmm.. have i covered almost everything?? i think i have..